SMH : If we all hid, then nothing would be different

If we all hid, then nothing would be different

This 39-year-old Burmese man, who has taken part in the protests in Rangoon, spoke to Helen Pidd on condition of anonymity.

October 1, 2007

TODAY was the first day I went to the protests on my own. All my friends were too scared to go out on the streets after being gassed and shot at over the last few days.

I woke up feeling more depressed and less optimistic than I have all week, but I felt it was my duty to carry on protesting. I was frightened, but aren't we all? If everybody hid indoors, nothing would ever change, and we would never be able to draw attention to the hopeless situation our country is facing. I need to stand and be counted.

When I arrived in the [city] centre, there were about 20,000 people gathered in the street, far fewer than earlier in the week, when there were up to 100,000 people. The crowd was made up of ordinary citizens; the average age was probably 25, though there were older people, too. I didn't see more than five or six monks. They are all still being kept somewhere secret after the military rounded them up on Wednesday night. We still don't know where they are or whether they are OK.

I couldn't believe it when I heard about monks being killed: they are the ones who bless babies after they have been born, and they remain hugely important to Buddhists throughout their lives.

Almost everyone in Burma is Buddhist, including 99 per cent of the army and police, so I can't understand how they could even consider laying a finger on a monk, let alone murdering them.

On other days we have marched around town. But today we just stood together, peacefully and quietly.

We didn't even clap or shout any slogans and, unlike before, no one was carrying the flag of the opposition party, the National League for Democracy, or Buddhist flags. The important thing was simply being there.

Then, at around 1 o'clock, the military arrived at one end of the road and tried to break up the group. Before long another truck appeared at the other end, and I saw three or four other trucks pass, filled with protesters.

The crowd then got angry, and people started swearing at the soldiers … That's when the soldiers started shooting. Not teargas, but bullets.

I was about 20 yards (18 metres) away, but I didn't get hit. I don't know if anyone else did, as I ran away as fast as I could. I was too frightened to turn around.

I ran to the cafe where my friends were gathered and told them what I had seen, though they had been following it on CNN. I felt so, so sad.

I am rapidly losing hope. After such a joyful beginning, I now don't believe that we will be able to change anything.